Reading Romeo & Juliet with Kids

I have been wanting to read (and talk about) more Shakespeare ever since I read Hamnet a couple of years ago. So when my book club decided to start the year off with Shakespeare’s Romeo & Juliet, I was thrilled. We thought it might be fun to read a play in 2023, so when we learned Romeo & Juliet was coming to the local theater in early March, it seemed like a sign. The night after book club, I told my kids I was going to see Romeo & Juliet with my book club friends; they asked if they could come along. What started as Ladies Night Out quickly became Mom and Kids' Night Out, and I couldn’t be more excited about it. I love when we find ways for adult book club to be something the kids can be a part of too.

I try to read at least one Shakespeare story with my kids each year. Although I still feel intimidated by Shakespearean English, my kids really adore the stories. We haven’t attempted to read it in play form yet, but I think we may attempt it with Romeo & Juliet. I put together a list of resources for my book club and thought I’d share it here on the blog too.

If you want to be brave with us and read Romeo & Juliet with your kids, here are some of my favorite resources:

When introducing Shakespeare for the first time, I found it really helpful to read a book about Shakespeare in general before diving into the poetry & stories he wrote. If your kids (or you) don’t know anything about Shakespeare, William Shakespeare & The Globe is a fantastic picture book biography.

Bruce Coville has an entire series of Shakespeare picture books. They use the original language to tell the story, so it's a great way to introduce Shakespearean English. The artwork is gorgeous as well, so it makes for a great cozy read by the fire. Sometimes libraries will have them, or you can buy a pretty inexpensive copy of Romeo & Juliet here.

A Stage Full of Shakespeare has a bunch of stories in narrative form. I picked this up at Costco on a whim last year and the girls adore it.

Tales from Shakespeare by Tina Packer is another beautiful compilation book of stories. I learned about this one through our A Gentle Feast curriculum. The girls love the artwork and the way the stories are written..

Beautiful Stories from Shakespeare by Edith Nesbit is also a compilation, with language that is somewhere between modern and Shakespearean. Nesbit wrote several other favorite children’s books, including Five Children and It, The Enchanted Castle, and The Railway Children.

If you want to read Romeo & Juliet in play form, but want plain English, No Fear Shakespeare is a great way to begin. This is the one I’m going to try to read with my kids.

For the Graphic Novel lovers, this graphic novel by No Fear Shakespeare gets great reviews.

As does this one by Gareth Hinds. I love the diversity of characters in the artwork.

This graphic novel includes the original text of the play for those who want to dive in to Shakespearean English but need a few pictures to help them along the way.

Also—who knew there were so many graphic novels for Romeo & Juliet?!

If your kids get all about Shakespeare and want to read more on their own, my oldest loved The Shakespeare Stealer. It has more to do with Hamlet than Romeo & Juliet, but it’s a very fun novel about what life might have been like when Shakespeare (and his actors) were alive.

And also, this podcast from Sarah Mackenzie is really great (and not just for homeschoolers!) She makes reading Shakespeare sound so much fun!

Have you read Shakespeare with your kids? Have you read it on your own? I’d love to hear about your love (or hate) for Shakespeare!

This post includes affiliate links.

Where We Read This Month: October 2022

Creeping in at the last minute this month to share with you another glimpse of where (and what) we’ve been reading lately. I love pulling all of these together because it really shows the variety of books we’re reading—and just how cozy our reading life really is, especially as the weather starts to turn.

I don’t get to do a lot of bedtime reading with the youngest anymore because of her gymnastics schedule, so this was a real treat. She finished up the Wings of Fire series and I started (and quickly abandoned) The Lady of the Rivers. I wanted to read the entire Plantagenet and Tudor Series to go along with our British History studies, but I just can’t get into Gregory’s writing style.

Our basement does triple duty as home office, spare bedroom, and library. I have no idea what she’s reading here - we have hundreds of books on the shelf downstairs, and they are always taking every single one of them off the shelf.

October has been the most beautiful month of the year. The weather has just been glorious, and we’ve been soaking up as much time outside as we can. The girls worked on reading every book in the Betsy Tacy series. A finished them. E decided to hold off on the last three until she’s a little bit older.

I did my very best to work my way through a huge stack of books about the Salem Witch Trial, but I was pretty much unsuccessful. I didn’t find many that I liked, but this Young Adult Novel was a creative modern day spin on the witch trials.

Sometimes on her gymnastics off days, I can convince her to go swimming with me at the YMCA. She of course found the shelf of books hidden in the cafe before we left.

Her favorite place to read lately is with Leo in her lap. The Secret Garden was her first Literature book this year and she declared it “one of the best books I’ve ever read.” She’s reading the copy my Aunt Paula got me when I was her age. There’s something special about your daughter reading your beloved book from childhood.

Doesn’t everyone bring their current read to the hair salon and read while you wait?

When the oldest was in a 30-minute dance lesson, I speed-read Rebecca, making it through 200 pages on the day of book club (because of course I procrastinated.) I felt like a rockstar.

Disclaimer: I had read it once before, so it was really just a refresher read. I don’t normally read that fast, nor do I recommend it. This is a beautiful book. One of my favorites. The audio version is superb!

Dog. Couch. Betsy Tacy Book. Are you sensing a pattern here?

My youngest got sick, again, for what felt like the hundredth time this year. It was actually the 8th time in 12 months, but who’s counting? I had zero brainspace for any book with hard language or deep messages, so I went all in to pleasure reading with Rosaline Palmer Takes the Cake. AND I AM SO GLAD I DID. I honestly was surprised how much I loved this book. Rosaline Palmer is a single mother who goes on a reality baking show and there’s baking, and romance, and motherhood, and I LOVED EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF IT. The second book in the series, Paris Daillencourt Is About to Crumble comes out tomorrow and I absolutely cannot wait to read it.

When she felt better, she decided the dog pen was the best place to read a book she found in our Little Free Library about a dog.

And when I had the brainspace, I finally picked up Take My Hand from my backlog of Book of the Month books. If you read my newsletter this month, you know I think this one is a must read.

Haven’t read my newsletter? You should go do that.

I took them to the library one day and they came back with a ton of Critter Club books. “Remember when you wouldn’t let me buy these?” they said. Yes, kid. I remember. But hey, if I can read (and love) Rosaline Palmer, I guess I can let them read (and love) Critter Club. Our reading life is all about balance.

I leave in 10 days for a Writing Retreat, and am doing all I can to finish this assigned reading before I get on the plane. So far, Cassandra at the Wedding is very good, but because I want to write every other paragraph in my commonplace book, it’s taking me a very long time to read. I am also very much enjoying the beautiful cover.

They’d read at every meal if I let them. Instead I let them read at the counter for breakfast and at the table for lunch, but I make them leave their books in the other room when we have dinner. I’m pretty sure one is reading If the Magic Fits and the other is reading One Jar of Magic, but they read books so quickly I can hardly keep up. I bought them each a copy of My Reading Adventures: A Book Journal for Kids so I have a better idea of just how many books they are reading each year.

And that’s a wrap on October! Where are you reading this month?

Where We're Reading This Month

I had so much fun with last month’s photo essay on where we’re reading that I thought I’d do it again this month. Here’s a glimpse at where (and what) we’ve been reading lately.

Towards the end of August, we said farewell to all of our visitors. While very sad to see them go back home to Georgia, I did enjoy the return of routine and quiet in the house. I made a cup of coffee, frothed some milk, and sat down to finish This is How It Always Is for my book club.

Early in the month we took a trip to Concord, my favorite town in all of Massachusetts, and found this adorable little used bookstore, where we read about castles and whatever other books we felt like picking up off the shelf.

We started our new homeschool year right around the same time the weather started cooling off, so we’re doing a lot of reading and narrating on the back porch. The Courage of Sarah Noble is the first Literature book for my third grader. Sometimes I’ll read it aloud to her and listen to her narration, other times she’ll listen to the audiobook and narrate to her iPad.

We’re also doing a lot of reading on the couch of the spare bedroom we’ve designated as the “School Room.” The fifth grader and I are reading The Witch of Blackbird Pond for American History and are learning so much about New England culture in the process. She prefers to narrate upside down.

Every morning, they wake up and eat a bowl of cereal while they read. One has just about finished the Wings of Fire series and the other is in the middle of reading every Betsy & Tacy book she can find.

When Queen Elizabeth died, I was ashamed of just how little I know about the British Monarchy. I searched my shelves for books I own that might help me understand how the monarchy came to be and made quite a large stack of books I’d like to read sooner rather than later. I’m starting with London by Edward Rutherfurd.

Leo (and Autumn) really love reading Our Island Story and learning about the history of King Charles I. Sadly, most everything I know about British History I’ve learned through teaching my kids.

With September comes the start of fall activities, which means we’re spending a lot of time in the car. While my oldest is in a dance lesson, the youngest and I read about Benjamin Franklin.

Then she did her math lesson while I read I Will Always Write Back: How One Letter Changed Two Lives. I can’t remember where I first heard about this book, but it’s quite a delightful read.

I was elated to discover the local library stays open until 8pm two days a week, which means I can hang out and read until time to pick up the youngest at gymnastics.

One night, when feeling particularly overwhelmed with the busy state of our family calendar, I ignored all the to-dos on my list and took The Long Devotion to the beach. I’ve been reading this very slowly since April. I kept putting it down because it hit too close to home and stirred up too many emotions I just didn’t want to handle. But I made it my priority this month to finish it. And it met me right where I was, in all of my confusion and despair and wonder if I could really mother and homeschool and write all at the same time. Mama writers, I highly recommend. 

D has had to go to the office several times this month, so we’re doing a lot of reading on the living room couch while the puppy naps by the fireplace. We finished The Magician’s Nephew this week, while one kid crocheted and the other worked on a paper castle.

Sometimes homeschool life is really hard, but sometimes it’s glorious. Like those days when it’s nearly perfect weather, so you pack your books and head to the local castle by the beach for a picnic lunch while quietly reading I Will Always Write Back, Betsy-Tacy, and Heaven to Betsy.

Fall weather has blown in and I am loving wearing yoga pants and cozy sweatshirts while reading The Moor’s Account.

Tell me friends … Where — and what — are you reading this month?

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Mama Dreams, Daughter Dreams

I’m standing in the kitchen, flipping through my planner, when I realize it doesn’t go past June. My husband David and I have just booked a vacation for July. I want to write it down. I toss the deficient planner aside and yell, “I’m going to Staples!”

“I want to go!” my nine-year-old, Autumn, calls, running down the stairs so fast I think she’ll fall flat on her face. She gleams at me expectantly once she reaches the bottom stair.

I take a deep breath; I was hoping to go alone. But arguing about it will be more work than allowing her to come along. “Alright, put some shoes on,” I say. “Maybe you can help me choose one.” A huge smile illuminates her face as she shoves her feet into an old worn pair of black boots.

We arrive at the store and head straight to the planners. I can’t find one I want—something simple yet pretty, with lots of blank space for notes. I rifle through what they have, not noticing that my daughter has walked to the other side of the aisle. She comes up beside me with a sparkly notebook, covered in so many jewels it looks like it’s been bedazzled. “Mama, can you buy this for me? I’ll pay you back.”

“Why do you need that? Don’t we have notebooks at home?” The moment I speak the words out loud, I realize their irony. I have two other planners—at home—that I have deemed “not good enough,” yet here I am, looking for another.

“Well, yeah,” she replies, looking down at the floor, “but I want to write a story.” Her voice is a whisper, as if she’s afraid to even speak it out loud. 

Read the rest of the story in the May/June issue of Literary Mama.

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Homeschool Mom Encounters Season of Doubt; Has No Clear Exit Strategy

BEVERLY, Massachusetts — When a local writer began homeschooling six years ago, she assumed it would only be for a year or two. As time went on, however, she fell in love with Charlotte Mason’s philosophy of education. By the time her oldest daughter was seven, she thought she’d homeschool her two girls until they went off to college. But in recent months, a storm of doubt has appeared on the horizon.

“I’ve always loved the slow lifestyle homeschooling allows,” Crystal Rowe, 41, told reporters. “We used to lay around in our pajamas until eight or nine every morning. My kids played quietly with toys or games I left on the coffee table, and I journaled while drinking my morning cup of coffee. We could go on field trips any time we wanted.” 

They had a great routine going until several months ago, when the family brought home their first pet — an Australian Labradoodle puppy named Leonardo Dawg Vinci. Now her mornings are consumed with making sure the puppy doesn’t get into any trouble. Any books or toys left on the coffee table become destroyed, so her two daughters have taken to hiding in the homeschool room playing with Legos or painting with watercolors. The dog hates being in his crate, so it’s even hard to take field trips. “Although he is very cute and loads of fun, he’s also a ton of work. Our lessons are continuously interrupted and I constantly feel distracted,” Rowe said. “I’m just not sure I want to do it anymore.”

The season of doubt began long before the puppy arrived, Rowe’s husband reported. “This is a conversation we’ve had several times in the last year. The puppy may just be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.” 

At first, Rowe’s husband questioned homeschooling. “I don’t want our kids to be weird,” he used to say. Then he realized how much they were learning at home. “Through just her reading to them and their discussions, they see the world in a different light.” Now, knowing the work of homeschooling falls on her, he provides input, but respects whatever decision she makes. 

When the pandemic first hit in March of 2020, Rowe’s husband, like many Americans, worked from home. “It caused quite a shift in our routine,” Rowe said, “But we finally found our groove. After several months of him being home, we were able to free up time for me to pursue a dream of my own.” So in January 2021, Rowe returned to writing after a ten-year hiatus to stay at home with her two daughters. But the balance of time writing and homeschooling, as well as other household responsibilities, has not been easy for her. 

“We are committed to reassessing every year to make sure homeschooling is still working for everyone, but the last two years that wasn’t on the table. The pandemic made school the last thing on my mind,” Rowe confessed. “Homeschooling absolutely worked for us—and tales of pandemic education made me not think twice. But as we emerge from isolation, I’m noticing my kids feel more lonely than they used to.” 

Each Spring, the family talks about their plans for the upcoming Fall. Every year, Rowe asks her children if they want to try school. Every year, they have said no. But this year, both girls have expressed a slight interest in going to school in the fall. 

At first, Rowe felt overjoyed. “If my kids go to school, I’ll have a good chunk of time everyday to myself. I can write! I can do part-time ministry consulting! I can keep my house clean, keep up with the laundry, bake yummy things. Maybe I’ll actually find time to get in shape,” Rowe laughed.

But after a day or two, she began to feel overwhelmed with the idea of sending her kids to school. She believes the education they get at home is better than any they’d get at school, for many reasons, but especially because of how personalized it can be. 

“Homeschooling is one of my greatest joys,” Rowe reports. “I love reading with them and watching their brains soak up the material. I learn so much through teaching them, and I don’t want to give that up.”  

When asked, Rowe’s ten-year-old said she thinks going to school will allow her more time with friends. “I love being at home with my mom and sister, but I want more teachers. And I want more time with friends.”

“I feel like I need to honor her request and at least explore the possibilities,” Rowe said. “I take pride in incorporating their opinions into our family life, and I want them to know I hear their requests.”

Knowing her children won’t live with her forever, Rowe oscillates between feeling confident that homeschooling is the best thing for their family and wanting the time to pursue her own dream. Rowe says some days she thinks she’s only doubting homeschool because she’s exhausted by all the work the puppy brings. “I’ve had showers of doubt before,” Rowe said, “but the clouds always pass. We don’t expect adults to be in a large room filled with peers the same age for seven hours a day, so why is school set up that way? I want my kids to have friends, and other teachers, and even a bit of structure. But a full day of school feels like too much.”

“On the other hand,” she continued; “Maybe I finally believe I can be more than ‘Just Mom’ and am ready to outsource education to someone else. I’ve always asked if homeschooling was working for them each year. What if homeschooling isn’t working for me anymore?” 

That’s a question Rowe isn’t sure she knows the answer to. Parts of it are working. And parts of it are not. “My mind and heart are so unsettled,” she stated. “I have more questions and doubts than I do answers. At this point, the storm of doubt is raging. We’re investigating options, but we have no clear exit strategy.”

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This post is part of a blog hop with Exhale—an online community of women pursuing creativity alongside motherhood, led by the writing team behind Coffee + Crumbs. Click here to view the next post in the series "Breaking News".

Discovering the Joy of Poetry

Did you know April is National Poetry Month? This post is the first in a three-part series on poetry. Don’t forget to read Part Two: Five Books of Poetry for Beginners and Part Three: How to Read (And Enjoy) Poetry.

I have a book of poems I wrote in my teen years—none of which feel particularly “good” nowadays—but writing poetry as a teen wasn’t about form or style. My teenage poetry took the form of a lot of questions. There weren’t many metaphors; not a lot of figurative language. It wasn’t poetry that would get any literary awards.

I never thought about being published. I wrote poetry as a way to process my emotions when I was going through hard times. Inspired by the psalms, my poems were prayers. Cries out to God to change my circumstances, or to give me strength to carry on. My teenage poetry was mostly sad. It was emotional. It was poetry that no one could write but me.

Ironically, though I wrote poetry in my high school years, I didn’t like to read poetry. Scarred by my high school English teacher’s questions: “What did the poet mean?” “What was he trying to say?” Reading poetry felt too hard; too scholarly. I didn’t want to think about the meaning behind the poem. I wanted to talk about what the poet was going through. I wanted to know her story. I had no interest in understanding metaphor or personification. I wanted to read something that made me know other people felt emotions deeply too.

I didn’t show anyone the poems I wrote. I kept them hidden in a box under my bed. When I graduated high school and went off to college, I left it at home. It was seven years later, cleaning out a closet at my Mom’s house, when I discovered my forgotten notebook, stuffed to the brim with favorite quotes and original poems.

Last year, I took a poetry course, in an attempt to rediscover the poet I once was. The first assignment was to create a poetry notebook. I groaned at first. Was this going to be another exercise in trying to figure out what the poet meant? But the instructions were different than I expected.

Choose any poem you’d like and copy it in your notebook. Underline words or phrases that stick out to you. Write about the senses: What does the poem make you see? Hear? Smell? Taste? What does it make you feel? Does it remind you of anything? What do you wonder?

These are all questions I’ve used when doing nature study with my kids, but I never thought to apply them to a poem. I soon learned reading poetry isn’t as much about understanding as it is about feeling. In a few short weeks, poetry became fun again. Poetry became a new way to play.

Each term, my kids and I choose a poet to study as part of our Beauty Loop. Study is really a misnomer; it’s more like a Poet Focus than a study. We don’t do much except read a short biography of the poet at the start of a term and one poem each week. Before I began my poetry notebook, I’d read a poem out loud and cross it off our list. But once I began enjoying poetry on my own, I wondered if there was more we could do to enjoy poetry together. We occasionally had poetry tea times—although not as often as I would like—but I wanted to bring my children into this new way to experience poetry. 

I wanted them to feel.

One day last fall, we sat on the homeschool room couch, cuddled together like three peas in a pod. Shakespeare was our poet and his poetry feels so hard. It seemed like a good time to experiment and have a little fun.

“Let’s try something new,” I said, grabbing my Teacher’s Guide off the table. “I want you to close your eyes as I read the poem.” My girls nodded their heads in agreement. Sometimes I ask them to close their eyes when we listen to a piece of music, so this request didn’t feel too odd.

“As I read, I want you to think about what images come to mind. What do you see? What do you hear or smell? What do you imagine in your mind?”

They closed their eyes and waited for me to begin. I read the poem out loud, being careful of the meter and rhyme. I discovered meter and rhyme in my poetry course, and I know what fun can be found in a sonnet. It almost makes you want to stand up and march.

“I like that beat,” Autumn said when I finished the final syllable. “It was almost like music.”

“It was, wasn’t it?” I agreed. They smiled and asked if I would read it again.

“I will, but first tell me what you imagined.” In rapid fire they began sharing what came to mind. 

“It seemed like he was sad,” Autumn said. 

“I saw a big mountain, with a grassy field and flowers,” Eden chimed in. 

After they told me all that was on their mind, I told them to stand up. I read it again. This time I saw their bodies begin to sway, moving along to the beat of stressed and unstressed syllables. I stood up and began to clap my hands to the beat as I read the poem a third and final time.

I finally understood the masterpiece of the Shakespearean sonnet. All it took was a little imagination and a little reading out loud.

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Chasing Dreams

The counter is covered
with the day’s supplies.
Colored pencils, base ten blocks,
workbooks, toys.

Heads full of knowledge
Imaginations running wild.

The morning sun streams
through the windows,
bringing warmth and happiness
to the cold winter day.

She cuts up an apple,
opens two cheese sticks
Answering questions
as they work to master another skill.

Mornings are her best time—
her most creative time—
but in this life they live,
mornings don’t belong to her.

She opens her notebook
Grabs her pen.

She’s learning to capture words
in the midst of the ordinary
Instead of waiting
for inspiration to strike.

This is what chasing her dreams
looks like today.

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The Best Kids' Chapter Books We Read Last Year

As a homeschooling family, we read a lot of really great books, so it was hard to narrow down our favorites from last year. My favorite part of our homeschool day is snuggling under a blanket on the couch, traveling to a new land through the words of well-written books. Most of these are books we chose to read outside of our regular curriculum, but two were part of our Literature selections through A Gentle Feast.

My daughters helped me compile this list, so every book listed below is Elementary-Kid Approved. Here they are, our the best kids chapter books we read in 2021 (in no particular order):

Peacemaker by Joseph Bruchac — In November, my book club chose this to read even though it was Kid Lit because we were short on time. We met for our regular Ladies’ Night, but we also read it to our kids and planned our first ever “Kids’ Edition” of book club. I was blown away by the insights and questions a group of 7-11 year olds had over this story. This book tells the story of the Peacemaker and the Iroquois Nation and is an important read for understanding a little known piece of American history.

The Christmas Pig by J.K. Rowling — Written by the author of the famous Harry Potter, this is a sweet story of a little boy who loses his favorite toy and the adventures he goes on to try to get him back. We listened to this as an audiobook on our very long road trip to Georgia, and it made us feel all the feels. It reminded me a little of The Velveteen Rabbit—one of my favorite books as a kid (and even now). I laughed; I cried; I will add it to my list of favorite Christmas Books to read every year.

Beyond the Bright Sea by Lauren Wolk—I found this book when searching for chapter books about Cape Cod before our summer vacation. It is a fascinating tale of a baby who is set out to sea in 1913, and discovered by a fisherman, who raises her on Elizabeth Island. As the girl gets older, she begins to wonder about her family and she goes off on an adventure to see what she can find. For older elementary readers, this is a lovely book about what it means to love.

The Vanderbeekers Make A Wish by Karina Van Glaser—Truth be told, I haven’t read this latest installment of the Vanderbeekers series, but my daughters assure me it is the best one yet. It’s all about Papa’s 40th birthday, and I really should add it to the top of my TBR pile. I adore The Vanderbeekers, and I’m sure this one is no exception.

Adventures with Waffles by Maria Parr — I will recommend this book over and over again. About a boy and girl in Norway, it’s a book that had our entire family laughing out loud. I will warn you that my favorite part of the book is also the saddest, but it is the most beautiful portrayal of death I’ve ever read in a piece of children’s literature. I don’t want to tell you anymore, because I want you to read it. It was, quite possibly, the best book I read in 2021.

The Shakespeare Stealer by Gary Blackwood—This was a Literature selection for my 4th grader this fall, and we loved every minute of it. We learned about the Plague, about Shakespeare and Hamlet, and about early 17th century London. I love a good historical fiction book that makes you want to learn more. We read this together at the same time that I was reading Hamnet for book club, so that made it a little extra fun.

Snow Treasure by Marie McSwigan—Based on a true story, this is a brilliant adventure story about Norwegian children who sneak past Nazis to hide nine million dollars worth of gold at the beginning of World War II. I highly recommend reading it snuggled up by the fire during these cold months of winter.

Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes by Eleanor Coerr—Another Literature selection for my oldest, this is a heart-wrenching book about a young girl who dies of leukemia caused by radiation poisoning from the bombing of Hiroshima. It’s a story of hope, courage, and resilience; and one that sparked a lot of dialogue about the ethics of war and what it feels like to lose someone we love.

Ban This Book by Alan Gratz—My oldest chose this book off the library shelves, read it in less than 24 hours, and then demanded I read it. We had a great conversation about why books are banned, why I will let them read any book they choose, and which books to add to our reading lists. Any book that makes her love reading is a favorite of mine.

Winnie’s Great War by Lindsay Mattick & Josh Greenhut —We listened to this audiobook on a road trip last summer and I couldn’t hold back the tears at the end. This is the sweetest, most adorable novel based on the true story of Winnie the Bear (inspiration for Winnie the Pooh) and I just want to read it over and over again.

Did you have any favorite kids’ chapter books from 2021?

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10 Things Saving My Life Right Now

Yesterday marked the midpoint between Winter and Spring. Spring will be here in 45 days, no matter what the Groundhog says. We can feel the days starting to get longer—we know the sun is setting a bit later each day—and yet we can feel our bones longing for the endless days of summer, when we stay up long past our bedtimes making s’mores and catching fireflies.

It’s this time of year that the winter doldrums start to hit. The thick snow that falls one weekend melts away several days later, taking our winter playground away. The sky is grey and cloudy, making us want to cry tears with every raindrop that falls. We start itching for warmer weather and sometimes forget the beauty that exists right before our eyes.

Every time about this year, Modern Mrs Darcy, taking a hint from Barbara Brown Taylor, invites readers to share “What’s Saving Your Life Right Now?” I love the practice of listing ten things giving me life in these dreary late-winter moments, so here we go … ten things saving my life right now.

Homemade Sourdough Bread

Not long after we moved into our house, a neighbor won my heart when she brought me the most delicious loaf of homemade sourdough filled with sweet black walnuts. She walked it up to my door with a jar of fig jam and a hunk of really good blue cheese and we’ve been friends ever since. 

The following winter, I decided I should try again to make sourdough bread. I tried to make sourdough bread several times when we lived in Atlanta, but every time was a flop. My friend gave me books to read, patiently answered all of my questions, encouraged me when my dough failed to rise, and even joined me in eating the flat, dense sourdough I had made. It took me six months, but I finally made a good loaf of sourdough bread (and danced around the kitchen like a loon the first time it happened). Now, five years later, bread-making day is one of my favorite days each week.

Sharing Meals

Last week, we had dinner at our friends’ house. That same friend that brought me homemade sourdough bread loves me so much she makes us shrimp & grits. On Sunday, the yard was filled with neighbor kids, shoveling sidewalks and digging tunnels in seven-feet mounds of snow. Later that day, a different neighbor invited us over for chicken pot pie. This weekend, we’ll have dinner at three different houses, to celebrate the end of the week, a birthday, and the kids’ reading all of Harry Potter. There’s something holy about joining together over a meal. It’s been nearly two years without sharing regular meals with one another, and I’m beyond thankful that it’s possible once again.

Church

I am so grateful to be part of a healthy, thriving church community. At the end of last year, we received a new pastor, and her gentle, yet powerful spirit is filling my heart and mind full of energy and excitement about the future of the church. We found our church just a year before the pandemic and we missed it more than anything else during the pandemic shut down. While worship still doesn’t look like it did in 2019, [maybe it never will?] being able to worship together is giving me so much life right now.

Encouragement

Over time, as David and I began to create community here in Massachusetts, people have begun to see our gifts and are encouraging us to use them. Gifts of hospitality, leadership, music, and writing; gifts that have been sitting unused for far too long. The hardest part of moving some place new is that no one knows you, and it can be hard at times to offer up our gifts to people we don’t know. We’ve both been invited to participate in leadership positions at church, and having someone really see our gifts and invite their usage is a true gift to us.

Lots of Layers

There was a time when getting outside in the winter was something I would never dream of doing. Then I learned that nature is God’s gift for helping us feel grounded, no matter what the weather. “There’s no such thing as bad weather,” as the Scandinavians say. It may be the midpoint between Winter and Spring, but freezing temperatures will be here for much longer than 45 days. Last year I invested in silk long underwear, and they are my favorite splurge purchase ever. This year I bought hand and feet warmers. With long underwear, good snow pants, and pocket warmers, there’s no excuse to stay indoors. The more we can be outside, the happier everyone is. 

Beaches

We live in close proximity to more beaches than I can count on both hands. Just yesterday we piled on all of our layers and headed to Plum Island, where we saw sand and snow mixed together in such a way that it looked like nature’s pudding parfait. The ocean is more healing than anything I’ve ever experienced, and sitting on the shore never, ever gets old. 

Homeschool

It is an honor and a privilege to be able to stay home and educate my kids. Every single day I learn something new from them. They teach me as much as I teach them, if not more. I know homeschooling is not the right choice for everyone, but leading them and learning alongside them is one of the very best parts of the cold and dreary days of winter.

Health

In a time where health is uncertain, I’m grateful that we have remained healthy through the many pandemic. We’ve fought a cold or two, but we’ve had no major illness. I am not the best mother—or wife—to sick people, so the more healthy days we can have, the better I feel.

Older Kids

The fact that my kids are seven and nine and not two and four is absolutely saving my life right now. I loved my babies, but there’s never a day goes by that I wish my kids were little again. We’ve reached a beautiful moment in parenting and I’d like to keep them this age for a little longer, I think.

My Husband

Our anniversary is in February, and David is always one of my favorite things about the month. He adores me. He thinks I’m gorgeous and can’t stay away from my body. He loves the way my mind never stops challenging him. He challenges me—gently— and he makes me a better me. 

Now it’s your turn. Tell me in the comments below: what’s saving your life right now?


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Peeing Alone

Gentle waves lap on the smooth sand, composing a soft lullaby on the shore. It’s a few hours after low tide. I’m lounging in my new backpack beach chair reading a book; the sand warm and dry under my toes. Seagulls squawk on nearby rocks, fighting over crumbs of food left behind. I look up from my book to see my daughters deep in imagination land, participating in cooking classes they’ve designed especially for the beach. With rusty pots and pans full of sand carefully imprinted with various shell patterns, I think they are learning how to bake sand cakes—or maybe cookies—I really don’t know for sure.

I am hesitant to interrupt this imaginary world they’ve created, but I really need to pee, and I really don’t want to do it in the ocean. The time on my phone says it’s been an hour or two since lunch, so it’s probably a good time for a bathroom break anyhow. I rise from my beach chair, put my book on the seat, and take a few steps closer to where they are.

“Hey,” I say, and they raise their heads to look at me. “What are ya’ll working on?” 

“We’re making sand cakes,” Eden says, before looking back to the creation in her lap. 

“I need to go to the bathroom. Can you find your shoes so we can walk that way?” Autumn, her hands covered with dark, wet sand, looks up at me with her big hazel eyes and says, “I don’t really need to go. Can we just stay here?” 

“Yeah, can we?” Eden joins in.

I feel my heart speed up. They’ve never asked to stay on the beach alone before, and I’m not really sure how to answer. I dig my toes into the sand, trying to process the gazillion thoughts running through my mind. On the one hand, the beach isn’t crowded today. There are only a handful of other families here; it’s not likely that my kids will be abducted while I walk to the bathroom. Their “cooking school” isn’t situated near the water; they are happily baking sand pastries on the hot rocks and there’s not much risk of drowning in the half-inch tide pool nearby. The bathroom is close—I can go and be back in ten minutes or less. 

On the other hand, these are my babies! Can I really leave them alone on the beach?!

I remind myself they aren’t really babies anymore—they are seven and nine. Is it finally time to give them a little more independence? Could it really be true that after nine years of parenting I can finally go to the bathroom all alone?

“Let me think about it for a minute.” I walk back to my chair and grab my phone out of its side pocket. Starting to feel mixed emotions of fear and exhilaration at the prospect of going to the bathroom alone, I text David to get his opinion. “As long as they don’t go in the water,” he texts back; “it’s probably fine.” 

I take a few moments to pull our chairs and blankets a few feet back from where we’ve been sitting. The tide is coming in slowly, but there’s no real threat that it will come up this far in the time it takes for me to pee. I’m really just doing this to prolong the decision I have to make. The blanket makes a swooshing sound along the sand, leaving a visible trail as I yank it from one spot to another just five feet away. I pick up my flip-flops and call Autumn over to where I’ve moved our gear. “I’m going to let you stay here while I go to the bathroom. Don’t get in the water. I’ll leave my phone with you. If anything weird happens, text Daddy. You know how to unlock the phone, right?”

Nodding her head, she tells me she knows the password and I chuckle. Of course she knows the password, I think, somehow kids always know how to figure them out. There’s a gleam of pride in her eyes; she’s always been wiser than her young years might suggest. I can tell she knows this is a big step for me, and I imagine she feels a little excitement at this new sense of responsibility I’ve just given her.

I walk over to Eden and tell her the same thing, emphasizing the part about not going in the water. She is my water-loving kid and the chilly New England water temperatures don’t keep her from running in. She’s typically respectful of my boundaries and has never given me a reason to believe she would jump in the water without me. I think I can trust her to stay put while I’m gone.

“I’ll be right back,” I tell them, and I walk away.

My heart feels like it might jump out of my chest as I walk towards the boardwalk. Every few steps, I turn to look back at them playing in the sand. They look so tiny on the beach, I think to myself, and I begin to pick up my pace.

I think about life just a few years ago; when they were two and four. The scene was similar; we were in our backyard instead of at the beach, and it was mud pies they were making instead of sand cakes. I told them I was going inside for a glass of water and you would have thought I told them I was leaving forever. “Wait Mama!” they would say; “I want to go! I don’t want to be out here alone!” 

Now here they are, five years later, asking to be left on the beach while I walk to the bathroom out of their sight. 

Hastily continuing towards the boardwalk, my feet swish through the crystalline sand; I pass two older women reading books in their chairs and my heart races. Will they notice I left my kids alone on the beach? Will they call the cops and report two children have been abandoned? Will they judge me? Or did they do the same thing once upon a time?

I know these are crazy thoughts. No one on this beach cares about me. They are enjoying their own solitude and peace. My racing heart is invisible to them. I’m not neglecting my children; I’m just going to the bathroom. Right?

I make it there in record time and say a brief prayer of gratitude that there’s no line. This feels silly because the beach is practically empty; the bathroom isn’t getting a lot of use today. I squat over the compost toilet; hear my pee trickle into the dark abyss. I wonder if my kids are okay. Has anyone noticed them alone on the beach? Will there be a lifeguard waiting for me when I get back?

After my bladder is relieved, I pull up my bikini bottoms and leave the stall. I contemplate leaving without washing my hands but we are still living in a pandemic. Besides, Ewww that’s gross. So I make bubbles vigorously and quickly—there’s no counting to twenty or singing the ABCs—shake my hands dry as I walk out the door. 

I swing my empty arms, wishing I had my phone so I knew how long I’ve been gone. Or maybe I would document this moment in time with a selfie to show up in my memories later—The first time I went to the bathroom all alone. I briefly consider having a conversation with David about getting the girls their own phone for times such as this—and then I shake that thought away. It’s only been a few minutes. I’m sure they are fine.

I trot over the sand-strewn boardwalk, slowing my pace when I get back on the sand. The last thing I want to do is draw attention to myself. I nonchalantly walk past the women sitting in their chairs; I’m relieved to see they are still heavily engrossed in their books. I scan the horizon for my girls, but can’t quite make out whether or not they are in the same place. Nervous nausea begins to creep into the pit of my stomach, but after a few more steps, I see they are right where I left them. Still making sand cakes. Safe and sound.

I breathe a sigh of relief and plop myself down in my chair. My feet slide through the sand as I stretch out my legs and glance over to where my daughters play. I think we have just crossed over into big kid land, and I’m not really sure how I feel about that. 

Is this what it will feel like to pee alone for the rest of my life?

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This post is part of a blog hop with Exhale—an online community of women pursuing creativity alongside motherhood, led by the writing team behind Coffee + Crumbs. Click here to view the next post in the series "Novel".

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